I was browsing a friend’s Facebook page when I came across an article titled “How to Never Let Fear Hold You Back Again.” Although I had found similar titles while googling, I decided to see if the writer had anything fresh and new to share.
I read the article. It was fine if on a scale of 1 to 10, your fear was around a 5. But if it was a 10, with 10 being overwhelmingly paralyzing, the article fell short.
Because of this, I strove to dig a little deeper. I started with the word FEAR. I almost went straight to Google to find some clever acronym to play with, but what came out of me was more on point. It was Focus mehighly strung. HASt. R.Eduardo.
You see, I had read the book, Feel the fear and do it anyway (the 2002 version) by Susan Jeffers years ago. And while it gave me the nerve to go against the grain of my Adult Child of An Alcoholic programming, it didn’t address what confronted me later. The Chesapeake Bay Bridge in Virginia.
Now, for you who have never had the pleasure of crossing this bridge, let me describe my encounter. I was driving happily, with my mother in the front seat and my teenage son in the back seat. We were traveling to Virginia to spend Christmas Day with my nephew and his wife. We laughed and talked as we flowed with the traffic down the slope of the bridge. And then, without warning, there was a hard drop, so hard it seemed like we were in a tailspin. It looked like we were going to fall right into the ominous water below. I was terrified!
I’m happy to report that I made it through without having a heart attack, dirtying my clothes, or having a full-blown panic attack. Still, the thought of having to drive back across that bridge to get home was tormenting. So while the article had some great ideas for overcoming fear, i.e. feel the fear and do it anyway and change your personal philosophy on failure, the author makes two points in his article, when dealing with the bridges of Chesapeake Bay Life: Relationships and business, you need a little more to chew on.
That’s when I dug through my experience and pulled out this key. If the reward in front of you isn’t compelling enough to override the fear, you can’t move on. One has to find that thing, that primal thingthat has enough torque to propel you, enough magnetism to draw you in, and enough glue to hold you.